How to Cope with a Painful Past of Prejudice: Finding the Pride in You

If you’re part of the LGBTQIA+ community, you can point in any direction and likely find someone who’s experienced prejudice. The prejudices we face while we’re moving from childhood through adolescence are harmful. You can move beyond them, though. There is no shame in being who you are. 

Regardless of what the prejudice was, overcoming it is foundational to positive mental health. Many people experience bullying or intimidation in school. Others have come out to their families only to receive the very opposite of support. Finding your pride is about acknowledging the trauma for what it is and moving past it.

How Society Normalizes Homophobia

There are a lot of ways that society and media normalize homophobia. They can be dated, like calling a boy a “pansy” for crying over a scraped knee. Or it might be as current as a YouTube gamer using homophobic slurs in every one of his live streams. 

When there is more focus on your sexuality than you as a person, that can be a problem.

Some of these instances may not have been malicious, but that doesn’t make them any less harmful. Coping with this prejudice is hard, but you don’t have to do it alone. In fact, we recommend you find your pride with friends. 

How to Cope with Prejudice

Discrimination is a hard but true reality for many people in the LGBTQIA+ community. We experience it as teens, watch other teens bear the same bullying, and still face daily microaggressions. Coping with this trauma is the first key to positive mental health.

Find your community

Find and keep close to the people who accept you for who you are. These are the non-toxic friends and family members. The ones who don’t make passive-aggressive comments or make homophobic jokes. Not just because they know you’re in the room and don’t want to offend you, but because they understand that the discrimination itself is inherently wrong.

If you’re having trouble finding a community near you, reach out on social media. There are hundreds of online support groups that can help you find people in your area. Maybe there’s no gay bar in your town. Google some nearby places to see if there’s a prideful gathering place just outside of your area. 

Use your story to empower others

No one is entitled to your story. That’s a concept every person should absorb and embody. Keep in mind, though, that there are others who grew up with similar prejudices as you. There are still an unfortunate number of teens and adolescence facing isolation and loneliness. You can use your experience to build them up and help them feel secure in their identity.

This is an experience that can translate into adult circles as well. Find your fellow pride friends and talk about what you’ve been through. Silence does normalize homophobia to a certain extent. So if you’re healed enough to make your experiences known, you can be part of what moves the conversation forward. 

Seek a professional

More and more mental health professionals are educating themselves on the unique traumas and experiences of the gay community. The help of a certified therapist has proven helpful in healing trauma and its related mental illnesses like depression, anxiety, and PTSD. 

Even if you aren’t experiencing symptoms of a severe mental illness, it’s still a good idea to speak with a therapist regularly. It’s necessary the same way well checks are necessary for your physical health. If you’re coping with trauma, the help of a therapist can be even more pivotal for you. 

They can help you establish healthy coping strategies and prepare for any tough conversations you might need to have. They can also connect you with local support groups, so if you’re feeling isolated, ask a professional for help.

Contact us to see how gay men’s counseling could help you.